When F. Scott Fitzgerald penned The Great Gatsby, it began as a semi-unrequited love story that kept the art of yearning alive. The same could be said of Charli XCX and her 2020 sleeper hit, “party 4 u.” The first time I heard this song in 2020, it easily became one of my favorites in the pop pioneer’s discography because of its unfiltered vulnerability (and, let’s be real, it’s still a banger despite its melancholic undertones).
Fast forward to now: Charli’s fan-favorite track has had a bit of a resurgence since it gained traction on TikTok. It even earned her a spot on Billboard’s Hot 100 just in time for the fifth anniversary of the album it sits on, How I’m Feeling Now. She even dropped a stunningly vulnerable music video to accompany the track and celebrate its newfound success.
“How I’m Feeling Now turns 5 years old tomorrow... It honestly just feels like yesterday,” she wrote ahead of the video’s release. “So much has changed since then: Me, my life, elements of my music, and most definitely the world. I made the album in just 5 weeks, from conception to release, entirely publicly in collaboration with all of you. It was so special. I felt like I rediscovered myself, my sanity, my sense of connection with the world, at a time where we were all so alone. To create with all of you helped me feel ok.”
That being said, let’s tap into the emotions she must have been feeling when writing the track. Here are Charli XCX’s “party 4 u” lyrics and their potential meaning.
Lyrics provided by Genius
[Chorus]
I only threw this party for you
Only threw this party for you, for you, for you
I was hopin’ you would come through
I was hopin’ you would come through, it’s true, it’s true
Only threw this party for you
I only threw this party for you, for you, for you
I’m about to party on you
Watch me, watch me party on you, yeah
According to the leader of the brat pack and her longtime collaborator, A.G. Cook, the song existed long before that record was even released and went through different variations dating back to 2017.
[Verse 1]
1,000 pink balloons
DJ with your favorite tunes
Birthday cake in August
But you were born 19th of June
Champagne pourin’ in your mouth
Called your friends from out of town
Got the party bag with the purple pills
And I’m waiting for you by the window, yeah
Called your digits, but the phone kept ringin’
Wish I knew what you were thinking, na-na-na
1,000 pink balloons
Dancin’ on to your favorite tunes
Hope you walk in the party
’Cause I threw the party just for you like woah
When describing the track to Apple Music, Charli revealed that the song was the oldest one on the album and that she felt that the right time to drop it was during the COVID-19 pandemic, when people craved community and seeing each other in real life.
“Lyrically, it also makes some sense now as it’s about throwing a party for someone who doesn’t come—the yearning to see someone but they’re not there,” she explained. “The song has literally grown—we recorded the first part in maybe 2017, there are crowd samples now in the song from the end of my Brixton Academy show in 2019, and now there are recordings of me at home during this period. It’s gone on a journey.”
The track is rumored to be about one of Charli’s exes, Mike Kerr of the band Royal Blood. While she never explicitly confirmed the song’s subject, fans on Reddit theorize it could be tied to the musician as she drops his birthday in the lyrics (June 19). The timeline also tracks since the song was initially written in 2017, and they had been spotted together throughout 2015 and 2016.
[Chorus]
[Verse 2]
You could watch me pull up on your body
Like it’s summer, take my clothes off
In the water, splash around and get you blessed by holy water
I don’t know what you were waiting for
You know that I’ve been waiting for you
I only threw this party for you
Yeah, if you saw my tears, would you touch me?
Kiss me on the mouth, say you love me?
Leave a message, tell me you’re sorry?
Hit me right back, hit me right back
Why you treating me like someone that you never loved?
Ah, yes, the famous fast-paced second verse that took over TikTok. She expresses her pain when the person doesn’t come through the doors of the party, and feels that they’ve lost touch in their relationship.
Might I add... it’s giving Jay Gatsby any time he threw a bash, and Daisy never showed. It might not have been intentional, but “party 4 u” reads like a modern retelling of Fitzgerald’s literary classic.
[Chorus]
[Break]
Party on you, party on you, party on
Party on you, party on you, party on
Party on you, party on you, party on
Party on you, party on you, party on
Party on you, party on you, party on
Party on you, party on you, party on
Party on you, party on you, party on
Party on you, party on you, party on
Party on you, party on you, party on
Party on you, party on you, party on
Party on you, party on you, party on
Party on you, party on you, party on
[Bridge]
Come to my party
Come to my party
All I’m thinking, all I know is
That I hope you knock on my door
Nervous energy
My heart rate rises higher, higher up
I wish you’d get here, kiss my face
Instead, you’re somewhere far away
My nervous energy will stay
I hope you realize one day, uh
Come to my party
Come to my party
On the bridge, Charli encapsulates the anxiety one might feel when they know a connection has reached its end. It’s this emotional turmoil mixed with acceptance and an endless spiral of paranoia. She captures this with the repetition of “party on you” and “come to my party” through the outro.
[Outro]
Party on you, party on you, party on
Party on you, party on you, party on (Oh)
Party on you, party on you, party on (Oh)
Party on you, party on you, party on
Party on you, party on you, party on (Ooh)
Party on you, party on you, party on
Party on you, party on you, party on (Oh)
Party on you, party on you, party on
Party on you, party on you, party on
Party on you, party on you, party on (Let's go)
Party on you, party on you, party on
Party on you, party on you, party on
